


Magick, Intrigue, and the Colonel's Heir

by Colourful_skies



Series: The Watford School of Alchemy [1]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: AU Family Backgrounds, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, BAMF Roy Mustang, But Also Rage, Crossover, Edward Elric Swears, Everyone needs a hug but they'll be okay, Feelings, Happy Ending, Headmaster!Roy, Hurt/Comfort, Is Roy Mustang a father??, M/M, Minor Character Death, POV third person alternating, Post-Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, Professor!Ed - Freeform, RIP Hughes family (I'm sorry), Romance, SnowBaz exists but isn't central, They/Them Pronouns for Envy (Fullmetal Alchemist), my soft boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:28:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28200906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Colourful_skies/pseuds/Colourful_skies
Summary: (Magickal AU in which Roy feels all the feelings and - unbeknownst to him - has a son fated to stop a looming threat.)Amestris’ leading alchemy school was designed to churn out State Alchemists. After the Promised Day, Colonel Roy Mustang hangs up his uniform and turns to educational reforms.A decade later, Roy gets more what he bargains for when he finds the “Chosen One” in Drachma. His new protégé is powerful, grieving, and almost as explosive as another young alchemist he once knew. Simon Snow’s education is uneventful at first, but things eventually come to a head. Can Professor Elric help with the monsters everywhere? Why can’t the past stay in the past? And why must Baz always be up to something?
Relationships: Edward Elric/Roy Mustang, Implied Maes Hughes/Roy Mustang, Past Gracia Hughes/Roy Mustang, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Series: The Watford School of Alchemy [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2040765
Comments: 5
Kudos: 11
Collections: Roy/Ed Week 2020





	1. Origins

**Author's Note:**

> I made this for the Roy/Ed Week prompt “crossover of your choice”. The premise of a Carry On/FMA Brotherhood crossover caught my imagination, and half of this was written before I knew it.
> 
> I tried to contextualize enough for this to make sense without knowing both canons. Familiarity of both would help, but between the two it would be more helpful to know FMA (Brotherhood).
> 
> Two notable changes to canon: 1) At Yousville, May continued home with Envy instead of returning for the Promised Day; 2) Baz wasn’t kidnapped and he didn’t (wouldn’t!) steal anyone’s voice. There are a couple of larger changes, but you’ll need to read to find out. ;)
> 
> (I promise the sad part I tagged is near the start! The fic is in turns light and angsty. Rated T for swearing.)

**A Widow’s Prelude**

Family is everything to me, so losing Maes ripped a hole into my chest. Finding a brave face for Elicia was the hardest; I felt like a ship unmoored in the storm around us. Tears fell into the dishpan. If my daughter was in the room, I turned my face away and scrubbed and scrubbed.

It took time, but eventually I found the strength to continue. I had to.

Before that, in the early days, we were all so numb. Among his friends, I think Roy was hit the hardest. I’ll never forget the haunted look in his eyes when he learned his best friend’s fate.

Roy was a godsend that first month. Days passed by faster than I could count them, but even in the middle of a coup he found time to bring casseroles. Sometimes he would watch Elicia and pull out those little voices that made her laugh. When he was here, things were almost normal.

One day, he dropped by when Elicia was staying over at a friend’s house. I’d appreciated the space to breathe; however, seeing him standing there, I realized it was company I sought.

“Come in,” I said.

We pulled out a bottle of wine. Not enough to lose ourselves, mind you, but enough to dull the edge of that void I knew he felt too. We sat on the couch, almost touching. Without meaning to, our easy conversation slipped into trading stories about Maes and all that he had brought to us.

Suddenly, it was crystal clear. _Oh my word, he loved Maes too._ I don’t know how I didn’t see it before. The habitual closeness of war buddies must have blinded me. I reached up and brushed away hair from Roy’s face, and he leaned into the touch.

“Gracia, you were the centre of Maes’ world,” said Roy. “You and Elicia. He cared for you more than anyone or anything else.”

“He wouldn’t let me forget it.” My smile was watery. “But he loved you too. Sometimes I wonder how much.” I look up in his dark eyes, which shone like bottomless pools. I tremble and begin to softly laugh or cry – I’m not entirely sure which.

“I never told you this,” said Roy, “because…well, it wouldn’t have sounded right. But you’re breathtaking.” He held my gaze. “Maes was lucky to have you.”

My fingers returned to his hair, as if drawn by a magnet. Slowly, I leaned in, lessening the distance between us, and softly found his lips with mine.

He looked startled and broke away after a moment. “Are you sure this is what you want?” I nodded.

And so we held each other. Our souls intertwined in our lament and together we tried to sate longing for the man who was no longer with us. It was comforting in a pure, clear way I hadn’t expected. But after we finished, I felt empty again. Equivalent exchange? Roy was a gentleman, but even this unconventional mourning wasn’t enough to bring my husband back.

Elicia and I stayed in town until the Bradley regime was overthrown. When it was safe, we migrated north to Drachma, where the haunting memories might not follow us.

I didn’t realize then that I was pregnant.

* * *

**Rebuilding**

After the Promised Day, Roy Mustang had no shortage of job offers. To everyone’s surprise, he accepted a post leading the Watford School for Alchemy. Instead of the promotion they’d planned, the military bid him adieu with a medal and a decommissioning.

King Bradley had been the official headmaster, but despite his typical iron fist, he’d led from afar and left administrative matters to the corrupt staff. The school was a couple of hours out of Central, but its curriculum was still startlingly militaristic. As Roy took the headmaster’s oath, he committed to reforms. First: the school would be less elite and exclusionary. Any alchemist could enrol. Second: it wouldn’t be so nationalist. Amestris deserved a well-rounded alchemy academy, one that didn’t groom the next generation into soldiers.

What became of the Elrics? Well, Alphonse was whole once more, his body no longer inching towards oblivion. That first hug between the brothers had been heartrending to watch.

The pair bypassed most of the media circus and returned home to Resembool. Roy was almost jealous of their (well-earned) rest. For his part, he recuperated as quickly as he could, made his job change, and found his hands full handling political fallout.

A few months later, Roy finally found time to breathe and take a few days off. He settled himself on a train and watched the countryside pass by in a blur. (He would never take sight for granted again.) Finally, the train rattled to a stop and Roy walked to his destination.

The Elrics’ door opened. “Fullmetal,” said Roy.

“‘S just Ed now,” said the slight blonde. “What do you want?”

Roy hesitated outside the door and Ed’s face broke into a grin. “Just messing with you, bastard. Come in. Al and Winry just set the table.”

The Elrics had been busy. They had rested, certainly, but also redirected their energies to new ventures.

“I’m leaving for Xing on Thursday,” said Al, between mouthfuls of dinner.

“Really?” Roy said. “So soon? What brings you two there?”

“Just me, this time,” said Al. He seemed almost bashful, twirling a fork through his potatoes. “Though Brother’s welcome to come too. I’m moving in with May.” The boy’s cheeks flushed.

That explained some things. “Congratulations and safe travels, Alphonse,” said Roy. He looked over to Ed. “Edward, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you two apart. Not for long.”

Ed’s smile was almost defiant. “I know he’ll be okay. I wanted to do something for me.” He speared a broccoli floret. “We heard rumours that there are communities of Xerxian refugees beyond the southern border.”

Roy’s eyes widened. “Really?”

“That’s what they say.” The broccoli was chewed with gusto. “Apparently they use a different source of power – not the Amestrisian tectonic plates, nor Xing’s dragon pulse.”

That explained his particular interest. Roy had suspected Ed wouldn’t give up alchemy without a fight. “Good luck, Ed. I hope you find them, and that you’re able to learn from each other.”

Ed nodded. “Thanks. That’s the plan.”

Postcards would follow, but Roy didn’t see the Elrics again in person for twelve years.

* * *

**The Chosen One**

Simon Snow thought he understood how he fit in the world. He was a citizen of Drachma. His mother had migrated before he was born to keep them safe. His sister was tough and smart (and sometimes terribly annoying).

And his father? His dad had been a great man who tragically perished in their homeland. Simon never met him, but sometimes he wished he could’ve had the chance.

In any case, Simon was a cog in a comfortable machine. He went to school, he helped with supper, he swept the floor sometimes. He eavesdropped on the neighbours as they chatted about which visitors had been captured for illegal acts (“alchemy”) as if regaling sports scores. Personally, Simon thought they must have made the whole thing up for attention. Magic wasn’t real.

It wasn’t until he was eleven that he realized how much he’d missed.

It was long past midnight and the moon shone bright. Simon woke up drenched from a forgotten nightmare. The stench of smoke filled his nostrils and he was overcome with dread.

He jumped to his feet so quickly he saw stars. His favourite red ball clattered to the floor and bounced under the desk. Shaking his head, Simon rushed to the door and almost tripped over something. Had an animal gotten in? He leaned over to examine it but paused at the rapidly increasing heat and pressure in the room.

A crackling by the window whipped his head around, and Simon registered that the curtains were aflame. As was the ceiling. How far did it extend? The heat built to an unbearable level and Simon collapsed once more.

Back to sleep.

 _What a hellish nightmare,_ thought Simon.

He regained consciousness in an ocean of smoke, pain, and mere mouthfuls of oxygen to keep him alive.

* * *

The boy was only eleven when Roy laid eyes on him.

During his summer break, Roy had been poring over a prophecy of a “Chosen One”. Prophecies were fleeting and imprecise, but you never knew; Roy had lost his faith in coincidences long ago.

His research had led him to a small village in Drachma. The place was not, in itself, remarkable. Similar to Resembool, it was hardly more than a handful of houses, fields and a main street.

Roy arrived on the late train and settled into the area’s only inn. Before he tucked in, sirens pierced the sky and Roy startled. His feet moved quickly as if by their own accord.

Smoke billowed outside, and the house next to the inn crumbled as it tore itself apart with flame. Sirens approached from a distance. Roy was almost knocked over by a soot-covered child.

The child stopped himself and trembled. He appeared to be in shock. “I didn’t mean to. Please.”

There was nothing more to be done about the house. Roy turned back to the tear-streamed face in front of him. The air crackled with alchemical energy. “They’re gone,” the boy said. “I couldn’t stop it.”

* * *

The boy called himself Simon. Roy took his hand and ran. Simon followed Roy stride for stride. The pair garnered odd looks as they crossed the border, but they breezed through with Roy’s name recognition and a fib about helping his nephew fix cars.

“There are community showers in Youswell, mate,” said one officer.

Roy’s impish grin faded as soon as they were out of sight.

“This is Amestris, right?” said Simon.

Roy nodded.

“Why here? Where are you taking me?” The kid’s shock ceded way to questions Roy had expected ten miles ago. The boy had eagerly agreed to flee to safety, but he still looked like he was in shock.

“Let’s backtrack. You said you had no one left. Drachma outlaws alchemy.”

Simon nodded quickly, singed bangs flopping up and down. “On pain of death,” he recited.

Roy’s tone was serious. “I haven’t felt alchemical energy as strong as yours in the last... dozen years. How have you been hiding it until now?”

Simon froze mid-nod. “What? No, I don’t do that. I’m not a criminal.”

Roy tried to restrain a quizzical look. “Simon. You can be honest with me.”

“It was a dream. This is… just… it makes no sense.” Simon sniffed. “What happened?” This last part was quiet, as if directed at himself.

“Simon,” Roy said kindly. He tentatively placed a hand on the child’s shoulder. “Please hear me. I’m not saying you started the fire. I’m saying that whatever happened there, you are positively radiating alchemical potential.” Roy swallowed. “Despite what you may have heard, that is a very exciting thing. But in Drachma, it will put you in danger.”

Simon took a deep breath, considering this.

“I am happy to get second and third opinions for you. I know a place where you can train. But the choice is yours.” Simon faltered under Roy’s gaze, then met it again. The air still smelled of smoke. “Do you know what you’ll do?”

A beat passed. “I think I believe you. And I need to understand.” Simon ran a hand through his curls. “I’ll do it.” A clock chimed nearby and he flinched. “I’ve gotta ask – why are you doing this?”

“You were in need,” said Roy. “That’s reason enough. And you deserve the freedom to learn… and to make your community better, if you choose.” A blonde and metallic duo flashed through his mind’s eye. “We crossed paths at the right moment, and I promised that I would do it differently this time.”

* * *

**First Year**

According to Simon, his only remaining family perished in the fire. He had nowhere else to go. Roy didn’t pry too heavily for the details, but his heart ached for the boy. To ease the logistics, he became the legal guardian of “Mr. Simon Snow”.

“I didn’t think Drachma had snow,” remarked Roy upon hearing the name. Simon shrugged.

Despite giving up his military credentials, the world conspired to keep calling Roy “Colonel Mustang”. His staff were invited to address him familiarly, but Roy didn’t really mind the imposing name following him in the wider world. Running a school was remarkably laden with politics. He felt like he had to wrestle the Old Families on the board into acquiescence for every single reform. If his name still held residual social capital from the Promised Day, so be it. “The Colonel” was here to change things.

Simon got the nickname “The Colonel’s Heir”, which he liked much less. Many of his new classmates had heard rumours of Simon’s existence and supposed power. Whispers followed him around the school. Tension lined Simon’s face those first few weeks.

Much to Roy’s relief, the boy eventually made friends and adapted to his new environment.

As headmaster, he was a busy man and didn’t want to show favouritism, but he encouraged Simon to stop by to visit and check in.

“My roommate is the worst, Roy.” This was a common refrain. “The Crucible must be rigged if it placed us together. Baz is _clearly_ up to something.”

“What does Penny think about this?” Roy was relieved Simon had found such a level-headed friend. She reminded him of Riza.

Simon sighed. “She thinks I talk about him too much. ‘Leave the guy alone.’ ‘Maybe he just likes evening walks.’” He imitated her voice.

“You know how I feel about vigilance,” said Roy. “It’s crucial, but there are times when making allies is the right move. Simon, you know you can tell me anything... but might it be worth giving him a chance?”

Simon grumbled in what might’ve been assent.

Two things quickly became apparent over the school year. One: Simon Snow had incredible raw potential. Two: he had very little control over his power. The explosions around the castle rivalled the Elric days.

Roy wondered what would become of this boy. He resolved to be a relatively hands-off mentor, not wielding Simon as a tool. Not for the first time, he cringed at how young he’d recruited Fullmetal. Simon might be a rather unpolished “Chosen One”, but he was also a likeable kid. What’s more, he was in a school and would (hopefully) learn how to wield his power with time. In the meantime, Roy would be there to listen.

* * *

**Second Year**

Simon’s second year became livelier for a different reason.

At the opening feast, an unfamiliar blonde sat with the professor’s table. Even from across the room, the stranger’s hair stood out as unusual; it was pulled into a long braid and clasped with silver.

“That‘s who Roy was telling me about,” Simon whispered to Penny. “Edward Elric. Apparently he was part of the task force who took down Führer Bradley and the Homunculi.”

“The Promised Day?” She looked impressed. “I heard The Colonel could have been Führer himself, if he’d wanted. If this guy was on his team, he must be really something.”

“I dunno. He said once that I reminded him of Ed as a kid. I didn’t imagine he’d be this short.”

The hubbub quieted as Ed was invited to speak.

“Hey,” said the man, with an awkward half-wave at the room. “Nice to be here. I’m Ed -”

“Professor Elric,” corrected one of his colleagues. Ed turned around to glare.

“– Ahem. And I’ll be teaching you Magick Words.”

The room buzzed again. Magick? Was this a new type of alchemy? Was it a joke?

There was a pause, and Roy stood up as well. He looked imposing in his headmaster robe. “As you may or may not have heard,” said Roy, “Professor Elric became a professor after a brief but celebrated career as the Fullmetal Alchemist. He completed cutting-edge research at Eastern University on Magick Words, which is a lost form of Xerxian alchemy.” His gaze moved to Ed and softened. “He is an impressive man and a personal friend of mine. Please give our newest faculty a warm Watford welcome!”

Simon clapped along, mind whirring with interest. In Roy’s stories, Ed had had incredible alchemical power, but then the man’s alchemy was lost during the Promised Day. That’s what Simon had heard, anyway. He was curious what they would learn from his class.

His gaze darted over to his nemesis (and roommate) Baz. The other boy looked excited as well, at least until he noticed Simon’s gaze and scowled. Simon glared back. Trust Baz to always ruin a nice moment with his stupid purple eyes. _I’d better make sure he doesn’t sabotage the new professor. That’s exactly the kind of crafty thing he’d do._

“Earth to Simon.” Penny caught his attention; it was time to go. Simon shook his head and gathered his things. “I’m curious what this new field will involve. I’ve only heard rumours of Magick.”

“I don’t know either.” They worked their way through the hall. “I have a feeling it will be interesting.”

* * *

Later that week, Roy’s focus was jarred by a series of loud knocks.

“Come in,” he called, putting down his report.

“Mustang.” Ed grinned. “Still ‘The Colonel’, I hear.”

He’d always known how to rile Roy up. “Roy’s really fine.” He offered a seat, an eyebrow quirked.

“Nice place you got here,” said Ed. “Thanks for the invite. It’s just like the old days… except maybe I’ll blow up less shit. That’s the plan.”

“If anyone can find new and impressive ways to wreak destruction, it’s you.”

Ed laughed. In some ways it was hard to link this world-wise twenty-eight-year-old to the boy Roy had once known. However, a few things were the same. Ed’s laugh. Ed’s twining golden braid. Ed’s –

“I see you haven’t grown taller with age.”

Ed’s eyes flashed, but with more humour than they once did. “I see you’re still a bastard.”

“I can’t disappoint my legions of adoring fans.” Roy preened.

Ed quirked an eyebrow. “So that’s why you’re running a school in the middle of nowhere instead of staying in the media circuit?”

“Clearly.” Roy smiled. “Though to push through reforms I’ve needed more political savvy than you’d think. Apparently Amestris wasn’t ready for their foremost source of State Alchemists to become a paragon of equitable education overnight.” Roy rolled his eyes. “You wouldn’t _believe_ the pushback I got for including ‘non-violence’ in our values statement.”

“Figures.” They sat in companionable silence for a moment.

“I’m glad you stopped by. I would’ve sought you out earlier, but…” Roy gestured at the stack of paperwork. “How are your classes going so far?”

Ed smiled. “Good. The students seem curious about Magick. A few have a good affinity.”

“What about the second years?”

Ed looked thoughtful. “Funny you should ask. That was my most interesting group.” His lips pinched together. “Roy, why the hell didn’t you warn me?”

“About Simon Snow? I’m sorry, he can be a bit volatile when he gets overwhelmed.”

“No, not Simon. _Selim_. You know, purple eyes, demon child who tried to kill us?”

“Oh.” Roy held his forehead in his hands and pinched the space between his eyes. He looked back up. “I’m sorry, Ed. I should have mentioned it.”

Ed scoffed. “You damn well should’ve. How is that allowed? Isn’t he dangerous?”

“You knew him as Pride.” Roy tented his fingers. “You remember what happened, after? When Pride’s Philosopher’s Stone was removed, he reverted back to an ordinary infant.” Roy swallowed. “Mrs. Bradley changed both their names and moved away. I hadn’t heard of them in years, so I suppose their hiding succeeded. But then last year, he enrolled.”

He met Ed’s gaze again. The other man seemed placated by this explanation.

“I had Dr. Marcoh check him, just in case. But you can’t mention this to others, Ed. They don’t know, and neither does he. As far as he knows, he’s always been Tyrannius Basilton Pitch.”

Ed snorted at the name. “Great disguise.”

Roy rolled his eyes. “Of course that’s what stood out to you.”

Ed shrugged. “Well, the whole thing’s a surprise. The kid’s kind of creepy. But if we could give Greed a second chance, I don’t see why a baby shouldn’t get one. He didn’t ask for this.”

Roy relaxed. Equal opportunity was one of the main pillars of Roy’s reforms.

“If anything, I’m more worried that Simon kid’s gonna get him first,” said Ed.

“Hmm? I’d heard they had a rivalry.”

“You could call it that. They bicker like you and me a decade ago.” Ed offered a crooked grin. “But I hope they figure it out. Baz has got this kid’s number. And when Simon got worked up in class, I swore he was gonna set off a smoke detector.”

Roy looked sheepish. “We haven’t figured out the _smoke thing_ yet. I met him after a fire, so I thought it was related, but apparently he’s a fog machine in any context. I think it bothers him, too, the poor kid.”

“Weird.” Ed fiddled with his braid. “So, I heard you’re his guardian?”

Roy nodded. “He has no one. He’s from Drachma, so now he stays with me for holidays instead.”

Ed gave the floor an inscrutable look.

Roy debated whether to continue. “It’s… kind of an unusual situation. A prophesy about the Chosen One led me to his village. The kid is a fire hydrant of alchemical power, but he can’t seem to get the hang of harnessing it.”

“Maybe he’ll take to Magick Words. His first attempt wasn’t bad.”

“I hope so. With his sheer power, I think he might be able to help with the ‘Insidious Humdrum’.”

Ed perked up. “Those power holes that’ve been popping up along tectonic plates? Dead zones or somethin’? I’ve been researching that. Scary stuff.” He shuddered.

“Exactly. Walking into one feels just like that time the Father shut off alchemy. The name’s a bit ridiculous, but there you go.”

Ed snorted. “Ye of no taste. It’s a kickass name – I came up with it myself. It’s been in some articles, but I’m studying it for my next book and hoping to derive a solution.”

Roy smiled. “If anyone can figure out what’s going on, it’s you.”

“Now you’re just butterin’ me up,” scoffed Ed. “Though you’re right, obviously.”

“I’m glad you’re here, Ed.”

“Thanks, bastard. I’m glad, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go! I’m excited to share this crossover AU with you. The fic is mostly drafted (~3 parts), and I plan to post a new part each Sunday. (Pending holiday timing)
> 
> For space and time reasons, I’m glossing over certain relationships and years, but if there’s interest I’d love to do more fic in this ’verse. I’ve already posted one SnowBaz-centric one-shot about snowball fighting set in eighth year. Feel free to suggest ideas. :)


	2. Confronting Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chimeras, secrets, and long-buried passion - oh my.   
> (Mostly a longer scene between Roy and Ed.)

**Second Year**

October was marred by a chimera attack.

On his way to Intermediate Arrays, Simon rounded the corner and came face to face with a large beast. The large, muscular swine stood on its hind legs and glared at Simon with murderous, humanlike eyes.

Beside him, Penny screamed.

“Another one bites the dust! Off with your head!” called Simon, but he couldn’t get Magick to stick to the words. He dug in his pockets, trying to find his alchemical gloves.

The chimera stepped forward and bared its teeth, a growl rising in its throat.

In the commotion, Simon noticed Baz standing nearby. “You did this,” he roared. Baz stayed rooted in place while Simon tried spell after spell.

“Enough,” said Professor Elric, who had heard the commotion and come running. “Everyone, stand back.” Wand in hand, he concentrated for a moment. “ **One little piggy went home**.”

The beast disappeared with a pop. Professor Elric relaxed. “Carry on, everyone.” Students nervously continued their rush to class, including Penny. “Not you two.” He gestured at Baz and Simon, who gulped.

“That was a chimera,” said Professor Elric. His tone was sharp. “Chimeras are rare and misunderstood. They do not just _materialize_ at Watford. Do you know where this one may have come from?”

“Baz brought it in, Professor,” said Simon. “I know it.”

“I highly doubt it,” said Professor Elric coolly. He sighed. “Whatever happened, I’d like to remind you that chimeras are sentient creatures.” He turned to Simon. “Self-defence is important, but not everything needs destructive Words. Be humane. This chimera was likely acting under duress or confusion.” A shadow covered his face. “Anyhow, it turned out fine. Basilton, I’d like a word.”

Simon wanted to do a victory dance. He walked back around the corner, as if to go to a class, but paused just out of sight.

“ _Was_ it you?” He heard an edge to the Professor’s voice.

“No, sir.” There was a long pause. “My roommate gets a… certain idea. But I wouldn’t try to _actually_ hurt him like that.”

“Very well.” Professor Elric paused. “I know you’ve had a… difficult upbringing. Some people might misunderstand or underestimate you, and I know what that’s like. No matter what, I want you to remember _why_ you’re here at Watford. You are your own person. Prove them all wrong.”

“Yes, Professor.” Baz sounded as bemused as Simon felt. He left his hiding spot and continued to his next class, deep in thought.

* * *

One November evening, Roy was once more attacking the mountain of paperwork that never seemed to disappear. He sighed.

Ed sauntered in, startling him from his focus. (The younger man visited often enough that knocking must have seemed a waste of time.)

“Ed,” said Roy. He should’ve been annoyed, but a part of him welcomed the interruption. A bigger part than he’d like to admit.

“Hey,” said Ed in a small voice.

Roy looked more closely at his face. “What’s wrong? Are you sick?”

“No, no,” he shook his head. “It’s just – what do you know about Simon’s family?”

Roy fidgeted with his pen. “Very little. The poor kid was traumatized enough… I didn’t want to force him to talk about them. I know he cared about them, though. From what I gather, he had a humble upbringing with his mother and sister until the fire.”

Ed hummed. “What if that wasn’t the whole truth?”

“What are you saying?” It wasn’t like Ed to tiptoe around anything.

“We were learning familial Magick,” said Ed. “No one was pressured to participate, but of course he wanted to try it too.”

Roy had an inkling of where this was going.

“I brought in a fountain, and we each cast ‘ **Blood is thicker than water** ’. Traditionally, it lets you see a projection of any family members who aren’t with you, given that you’ve met them. Regardless of their… mortality status.” He cast it now in his glass flask, and an image of Alphonse, Hohenheim, and Trisha froze within it. Roy remembered to keep breathing. “‘Chosen family’ not included, since it’s blood Magick.” Ed dismissed the projection and continued.

“When it was Simon’s turn, I recognized them. It was Gracia and Elicia.” He gulped. “The Hugheses are Simon’s dead family.”

“What?” Roy’s heart plunged to the floor. “I’d heard that those two left town after everything that happened… but I never knew their destination. I’d always thought they’d make it.” His vision blurred at the edges. “That poor family. And… Merlin, Ed. Simon’s twelve.” He met Ed’s eyes. “Maes must have… this must have been his last gift to the world before he was killed.”

Ed held the gaze, brow furrowed in concern; he’d evidently come to that conclusion as well.

Suddenly overwhelmed and dizzy, Roy crossed his arms on the desk and put his head down. _Breathe_. He liked (who’s he kidding, loved) Simon like he was his own. There was some headmasterly distance, sure, but Simon was a good kid, and Roy had vowed to protect and mentor him. He should have known Maes’ blood was in his veins. What a cruel twist of fate, that such two pure souls could have been forever cheated of each others’ company. And… oh, Gracia and Elicia…

 **Stay dry** , murmured Ed, and Roy realized he was dripping on the paperwork. He dared a glance up and realized Ed was now right next to him. Ed laid a hand on Roy’s shoulder.

“Does Simon know?” asked Roy, sounding strangled. “Does he realize that we know them, and his connection to the Promised Day?”

“I don’t think so,” said Ed. “He stayed behind to chat with me. He seemed ashamed he couldn’t project his father, even though Baz had the same problem. Most students invoked both parents easily.” Ed paused. “I tried to reassure him, though the poor kid looked upset. I get a sense he still mourns his family much more than he lets on. Understandable.” He fiddled with his wand. “Apparently, Gracia found it too hard to talk about his father, so his sister filled in some details. He knows his dad was a war hero that loved them very much… but not much beyond that.”

“Should he know?” Roy asked his desk.

“What?” Ed gently turned Roy’s chin so that they were face-to-face again.

“Do we have a duty to tell him? Or a duty to protect him, instead?”

Ed was startled. “It’s his life, Roy. I wanted to give you a heads up, but isn’t it important for him to know?”

Roy frowned. “I guess… but he’s a child. He’s still so young.”

Ed cocked an eyebrow. “I was his age when I was recruited to the military. _You_ came to _me_.”

“Exactly.” Roy stood up suddenly. “That was one of my deepest regrets.”

“Seriously Roy, after everything?” Ed’s eyes flared. “My life is your biggest regret?”

“The military stole your innocence! You should’ve been honing your skills among peers, not wielding them as a weapon for a corrupt nation.” Roy began pacing, fruitlessly trying to calm down.

“After Envy came, you told me Maes was on fucking vacation. How long was that lie supposed to last?” Roy noticed Ed’s braid unravelling near the bottom. “ _Don’t worry, your friend’s out at the farm!_ Like we were babies hearing about the rainbow bridge.” Ed scoffed bitterly. “Every second my brother and I were underestimated, we lost time. That time was _directly proportional_ to lives saved. I didn’t want to be treated like a child!”

“But maybe you should have been!” Without realizing, they had both raised their voices. Roy chastened. “Ed. I never distrusted you. I hope you know that now.”

“It damn well looked like it.” Ed’s face was flushed. “I saved your ass, even if you also saved mine.”

“Listen to me.” Roy placed his hands on Ed’s shoulders, his grip soft but firm. “It’s not that. You are clearly a badass.” Ed’s eyes widened at his sincerity. “You were always an incredible alchemist, long before you had any business being one, and now you’re shattering expectation as a mage.” His lips formed a line. “This conversation is about the duty I had to protect you. I gave you an impossible choice when you were so, so young. And every day, every time I sent you on a mission,” Roy paused, breathing heavily. “Every time, I’d wonder if you were coming back. And then, Maes’ murder broke me in half.”

Ed studied Roy’s collar, remembering.

“After that, I never forgot that it could’ve happened to any of us.” Roy breathed. He realized his hands still rested on Ed’s shoulders. Huh.

“I know,” said Ed softly, the storm in his eyes receding. “Thank Merlin it didn’t.”

Their shared gaze simmered, and then Ed pulled Roy into an unexpected hug. “I knew I could always count on you. If it matters, Roy, it wouldn’t have been your fault.” He ran a finger through Roy’s hair, which felt surprisingly nice. “I always looked up to you, but my own life was _the Fullmetal Alchemist show_.” His sarcasm was awarded with a watery smile.

The pair became aware of their position and stopped essentially clutching each other.

“Roy,” started Ed, “I’ve got to ask. Why didn’t you want to work with me in Central anymore? After all that shit we went through?”

Roy failed to mask his confusion. “What?” He blinked. “I thought you left the military right after the Promised Day, even earlier than me.”

“Sure.” Ed shrugged. “But they tried to convince me not to leave. They dangled that I’d finally be free of ‘that bastard general’ because you’d arranged for a transfer.”

Roy blanched. He didn’t think that his request had ever been shared, since Ed had so quickly quit the military.

“And then you didn’t talk to me for twelve years.” Ed shushed Roy’s protests. “Yes, yes, holiday cards. But I was gone years, Roy. I thought we were friends. _Twelve fucking years_ , Roy, and then what? A job offer out of nowhere?”

“Why didn’t _you_ reach out?” Roy was embarrassed by the defensiveness that crept into his voice.

“I don’t – stop deflecting.”

Roy sighed. “When I met you, you were a child.” He started pacing. “You were my mentee, and for all I sometimes failed at protecting you, I never thought of you as anything else. Not a weapon, not a chess piece, not any… other thing.” He stopped in front of the window, where the dusk was tinging the sky purple. “As we worked together other the years, I realized I’d underestimated you.”

Ed perched on the edge of Roy’s desk.

“You were a true colleague. A friend. My fear of losing you became more personal. And Ed, you were _damn_ good at courting death. God knows your skillset wasn’t in paperwork.” Roy pressed his forehead to the cool glass. “Those final days, I recognized something in myself. I realized I might… be capable of more complex feelings for you.”

The silence grew and thickened.

“I realize it made no sense. I knew that even then. But it was also a problem. I could not go down that road. There were so many barriers: age, rank… the small matter of you hating me.” Roy laughed wryly. “You deserved someone who could be an impartial superior. Now, I feel better situated to do that, and we have a flatter hierarchy here regardless.”

“What if you had?”

“What if I’d what?”

“Don’t play dumb, bastard.” A playful spark had returned to Ed’s eyes. “I would’ve jumped your bones.”

Roy just stared at him. “But you hated me.”

“It was all in good fun.”

“You were a teenager! I was your commanding officer!”

“It was legal. And I was gonna quit anyway.” Ed brushed off his objections. “Whatever.”

“You don’t understand. It would’ve been so… _questionable_.”

“Well, fine. We didn’t, anyway.” How did Ed keep getting so close to him? Bringing those golden eyes so close to his should be criminal. “But there’s no time like the present.”

Roy’s monologuing energy had run out. Now he was frozen in Ed’s electrifying gaze.

“I had a crush on you for years. It’s part of why I gave you so much shit,” admitted Ed. “At the time, it was a schoolboy crush. But near the end, I kind of wondered.” He paused. “I was a bit gutted when you dropped off the face of the earth, after, sure, but I figured you just didn’t want to be reminded of everything that had happened.” He gestured vaguely at the damp paperwork. “I’ve gotta say though… you’re still a damn fine as a bit of a silver fox.”

Roy sputtered. He didn’t have _that_ many greys. “Says you. All this time later and you’re still like an angel. I don’t know how anyone else stands it.” He reached for Ed’s hips.

“Roy,” said Ed wonderingly, and then he closed the distance between us with his lips.

Roy leaned into the kiss, thinking he must be caught in one of the best dreams he’d had.

Eventually, they broke apart, smiling and short of breath.

After a moment, Roy broke the silence.

“You were right, earlier. It can be difficult to dredge up the past, but it can be beautiful and healing. I’ll tell Simon what we know.”

The two stayed there a while longer, wrapped in each other’s arms.

* * *

Two towers over, Simon and Baz were arguing in their room. It might’ve been about leaving water on the bathroom floor or Baz being “up to something” (Baz always rewarded these accusations with a sneer). The boys were still young; they didn’t realize yet what their fiery obsession with each other might mean. Life continued in its ebb and flow, with the players engaged in their eternal dance.

It would take until eighth year for everything to fall apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I realize the audience for this one is more niche, given the crossover, but if you're here I hope you're enjoying it. Wishing you all the best this holiday season.


	3. Rejoinders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens. Nice conversations followed by angst all around.   
> (Simon is done with this shit, just as a familiar foe returns...)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay! Here is the next part - so much drama. I've drafted a few more thousand words, so it's looking like one more part.

**Eighth Year**

“Brother!”

Roy walked by the entryway at the right moment to see a streak of blonde dash outside.

“Al!”

The two brothers embraced on the doorstep. Roy smiled. He gave them a moment and then stepped forward as they broke apart.

“Welcome, Alphonse!”

The other blonde smiled at him. “It’s been a while, Col – Wait, what should I call you?”

“Roy is fine.” It was so good to see Al beaming and healthy-looking. They’d kept in touch, but Roy had still only seen him a couple of times since the start of Ed’s tenure. Usually Ed travelled to Xing over his holidays, rather than the other way around. He held out a hand and they shook. “Would you like a tour of the castle? Unless Ed already has it covered.”

Ed looked at Roy appreciatively, and then turned back to Al. “Sorry, I actually have class in a few, so I can’t stay. If you’re not too tired, you should take the bastard up on his offer.”

“Brother,” said Al, scandalized. “The children.”

“No one’s here.” Ed looked back at Roy, a smile playing at his lips. “And he knows I don’t mean it.”

“Ha, ha.” Roy said dryly, but he didn’t manage to look bothered.

“Well, a tour sounds lovely.” Al hugged Ed, who returned it and then headed on his way. “Lead the way.”

They started with the main building, and then walked across campus. Roy pointed out the Cloisters, the White Chapel, and the unfortunately named Weeping Tower.

As they passed by Mummers House, there seemed to be a commotion outside. Simon and Baz were having a bit of a shouting match, and it fell to Roy to defuse it.

“Sorry you had to see that,” said Roy once it was sorted out. “Usually the students are a little more… peaceful.”

“It’s no problem to me,” said Al, shrugging. He grinned. “I haven’t heard bickering like that since you and Ed. Give it a few years and who knows what could happen.”

“Simon and Baz? Really?” Roy was relieved to see the sparkle in Al’s eye. When he’d first heard about their new relationship, he allegedly said _“Finally!”_ , but Roy still received a sternly worded _“If you hurt him I’ll end you”_ -type letter. “Stranger things have happened. For now, I’d like to keep them from killing each other.”

They continued the tour, crossing the moat and walking towards the hills where Al would be helping Ebb this term with goats.

Al’s expression faded into something grave.

“Are you all right?”

Al cleared his throat. “There’s something I need to tell you. Brother, too, but I’ll talk to him later – I wanted it to be in person.”

Roy’s mind jumped to the worst conclusions. They continued walking, the drawbridge receding into the distance. “What is it?”

“Remember how May took Envy back to Xing? And how there was a recent transfer of Xingese chimeras to Amestris because of the ground-breaking assistive research my brother began?”

“Sure.” Roy didn’t like where this was going.

“The initiative _has_ been going well. It’s helped a lot of people regain their lives, people who’d been written off after they were subjected to chimera research.”

“I’m sensing a ‘but’.”

Al’s lips narrowed. “Last week, there was one extra chimera on board that disappeared before the counting in Amestris. When guards went to figure out what had happened… Envy was gone from their cage.”

Roy’s stomach dropped. “What?”

“We think they must have absorbed energy from a few guards – given a bit more time, they could probably transform again.”

Roy swore quietly. “So we wouldn’t see them coming.” He clenched his fists, little half-moons digging into his palms. He would need to wear his gloves more often. “Have there been any sightings of Envy?”

“Not yet,” said Al. “We’ve put up posters, and I’ve brought a few for here, if you’d like them. There’s no guarantee Envy will come here, but given their history, it’s worth being prepared.”

Roy stared into the moat, prodding at his thoughts. “Yes,” he said. “I’m afraid you’re right.”

* * *

It was Saturday lunch, meaning that there were stacks of sour cherry scones on the table. Simon stuffed another into his mouth, mid-conversation with Penny. He swallowed and continued his diatribe.

“He’s being even weirder than usual!”

Penny scolded him. “You act like Baz has eyes everywhere.”

“Well, maybe he does! He certainly has enough minions. And I swear he can disappear into thin air.”

“Maybe because he has practice, from his roommate stalking him every night.”

“I’m not stalking him! It’s just – I know he’s up to something!”

Penny sighed, a small humph. “Well, there’s your 10% talking-about-him-today quota filled. Maybe we’ll solve the Baz Pitch mystery tomorrow.”

Simon wanted to throw his hands up in the air, but he knew when he was beaten.

Once a suitable number of scones were demolished, he grabbed his bag and went to Advanced Magick Words.

“Simon. You’re early,” Professor Elric said, putting the finishing touches on a whiteboard diagram.

“Oh, I guess so.” He hadn’t really been paying attention. However, this was a chance to talk to Professor Elric in privacy. “Listen, how did you lose your alchemy, again?” A+ sensitivity as always.

Professor Elric just stared at him for a moment, as if sizing him up. Or considering what to say.

“I mean,” Simon blustered on, “what was it like meeting Truth? How did you know offering your alchemy would save your brother?” He’d heard some details from history class – everyone had – but the professor himself hardly talked about the Promised Day.

“Damn, Simon,” said Professor Elric. He twirled the marker and set it down. “It’s a fair question, though.” He swallowed. “Truth is… not an entity you want to meet. It’s terrifying and ruthless, and it lives by some kind of cosmic justice that hardly seems fair from a human perspective.” He stopped gazing into middle distance to meet Simon’s eyes. “You’ve heard the saying from most of your professors, I imagine: ‘equivalent exchange’. That’s easy enough, but knowing what Truth considers equivalent is the real b- difficult part.”

Simon blinked. This made sense, kind of.

“Did I know that my alchemy would be equivalent to Al’s life? No. However, it _hurt_ to lose and it was an integral part of me… but if I had to pick one to give up, I would give up my alchemy to save Al every time.” The professor’s mouth quirked into a slight smile. “I offered the sacrifice, and I hoped, and the world is damn lucky it still has Alphonse Elric in it. And if my life’s a bit different, so be it.”

His gaze sharpened. “Why do you ask? Truth is nothing to scoff at, and you can _not_ touch human transmutation with a ten-foot pole, even if there are… people you miss.”

Simon flushed. “N- no, I wouldn’t do that.” He cleared his throat. “I just… they don’t talk about that part of your story. I was curious. Thanks.”

Professor Elric relaxed. “Sure. I wouldn’t shout it from the rooftops, but you know you can always come to me with questions, yeah? You’re a good kid.”

“Thanks, Professor.”

Simon’s classmates began filing in. Professor Elric turned back towards his nearly finished diagram. “Just… stay safe. Don’t fly too close to the sun.”

* * *

The dead spots multiplied, popping up almost every month now. Long gone were the days of one or two appearing per year.

Equally concerning, the attacks on Watford were steadily worsening. The onslaught of creatures seemed drawn to Simon, who was arguably the only one powerful to thwart them.

Of course, powerful didn’t mean _capable_ ; not exactly. Simon had just as much raw power as he once did, but his control hadn’t caught up. Neither his alchemy nor his Magick could sustain the precision needed for complex maneuvres. Roy sighed. More often than not, Simon won by becoming overwhelmed and just… going off. Exploding and – thankfully – leaving himself unharmed and covered in soot.

There was also the matter of _why_. Like that chimera back in his second year, each dragon, golem or animal seemed to have been dragged there. Most were aggressive enough to fight fiercely, posing a safety threat, but none had a specific intent. It’s like they fell out of the sky right, like the universe had caught them, shook them up a bit, and spat them out on Watford’s grounds. The universe, perhaps, or the Humdrum itself.

Today Simon had stopped the biggest dragon Roy had ever seen.

Roy was still dashing over when the showdown happened. It almost seemed like Simon and Baz worked together – surely not – but in any case, the dragon was dissuaded safely without any “going off” necessary.

Roy had breathed a sigh of relief and told Simon to meet him at the office once he’d cleaned up.

And so here he sat, pretending for a moment longer that paperwork would help with this disaster. He stared at the latest forms blankly, mulling it all over.

His reverie was broken by a timid knock.

“Come in.”

Simon walked in with damp hair and clothes not covered in soot and dragon spit. “Hey, Roy.”

“My boy.” Roy walked over and gingerly wrapped him in a hug. He was trying to be a warmer guardian, but he often felt like he didn’t know how. Roy pulled back and looked at him. “Are you all right?”

Simon still looked a bit shaken. “Sure,” he said. “Nothing I haven’t seen before.”

Roy frowned. “That’s the problem, isn’t it.”

“Hmm?”

“We still don’t understand what’s going on. It seems like the Humdrum is sending more and more threats here – to Watford? To you? In any case, it’s not safe for you right now.” Roy hoped for a good reception. “It’s time to leave.”

“What? No, I can’t!” So much for that.

“Simon, much as I am loathe to admit it, there are safehouses that can keep you safer than here,” said Roy.

“Are you kidding? The attacks are getting worse and you want me to hide? You just want me out of the way again!” The air smelled of smoke, and Roy realized he may have misjudged this.

“That’s not true,” said Roy. “Well, yes, you haven’t been invited on my political journeys and ‘Humdrum’ research lately...” He paced. “But none of that is because I want you ‘out of the way’. I want you safe.”

Simon wore an expression Roy had hardly seen on him: a combination of hurt and scorn. “You don’t trust that I could help you. You called me the ‘Chosen One’ despite the fact I can’t do shit, and now you regret it.”

“No!” Without realizing it, Roy raised his voice. “Do you hear yourself? We need you, and we need you alive. You’ve brought down the vast majority of the Humdrum’s threats so far.”

“The threats and all the property within a hundred metres,” said Simon. “Don’t tell me I’m wrong! I’m useless, aren’t I? Anywhere I go, it’s like bringing a flamethrower! Best if I just stand down!”

Roy had thought he could do it all differently, but he was confronted with the memory of another youth who’d determinedly charged into conflict. However, this time he was face-to-face with an eighteen-year old. He was a guardian here, not a boss, and he couldn’t defer him with sheafs of reports. _I tried to keep you out of battle, Simon but… I’m sorry, I don’t know how._

“Very well,” said Roy.

“What?”

“Come with me. That’s what you want, isn’t it? I’m going on a sabbatical to try to understand and stop the Humdrum once and for all. It’s going to be dangerous, and I regret that for you, but it would be helpful to have you along.”

Simon deliberated for a moment, his gaze intense. “No.”

Roy raised his eyebrows. “You don’t want to be safe, but you don’t want to fight? You want to wait until you’re killed one day in class?”

“I’m a student,” said Simon hotly, “and this is my home. _You_ told me education is important, and I’m going to stick with it. I can defend my loved ones fine from here.”

Roy blinked at him, considering the best words to choose. “Simon –”

“You’re nice enough, when you’re around, but I’ve been following you without question. I’m fucking tired, and I’m an adult now. Maybe I don’t need a guardian anymore.” Simon wielded his words like the sword he carried, blinking as if unaware that he’d just stabbed Roy in the heart.

“Legally, no, but Simon, I’m so sorry if –”

“It’s fine,” stormed Simon. “I just – stop treating me like a child, and stop acting like you’re always _here_ when you haven’t had time for me in years.” He fidgeted anxiously with his curls, breathing like he willed himself not to go off. “Listen… good luck on your sabbatical. Call me if you really need me, and you’re convinced I won’t make things worse. Bye.” He waved and walked out without a backwards glance.

Roy reeled. Obviously he’d misread the situation with Simon, but was something else going on? This just felt so sudden. Had he been blind to something larger?

Before he could gather himself and rush after Simon, Ed stepped in the empty door. He brandished an envelope and practically vibrated with energy.

“Ed? What’s wrong?”

“Open it,” said Ed. “It’s alchemically sealed to you. But fuck, Roy, can you guess where I got this?”

The answer was in Ed’s eyes. “Oh, no.”

“Envy’s _here_. They popped up with the envelope and then transformed into an ant. I couldn’t follow them into the wall, but shit, Roy, Envy is _here_ at the school.”

“Fuck,” breathed Roy. He tore open the envelope and felt the blood drain from his face. Ed read the letter over his shoulder

The text dripped with threats, but it held a few pertinent details. One: The Humdrum attacks would come to a head, and soon. Two: Envy had evidence that Roy Mustang was Simon Snow’s father – by blood. Roy looked it over and gulped.

“You’ve got to talk to Simon first. _Damn_.”

“You saw him just now. He wants nothing to do with me, at least for a while.”

“Fuck that. He thought his father was dead and he deserves to know the truth.”

“Now’s not the time for a reunion; are you kidding? I’ve done a middling job as the kid’s guardian, apparently. If he finds out I’m his kin, too, he’ll be crushed.” Roy crumpled the paper in his fist. “It could throw him off, put him in danger, and for what?”

“You’re just going to fuck off, like Hohenheim did to me and Al?” Ed seethed. “Calling yourself a disappointment – you’re not, Roy. At least, I thought you weren’t. Maybe I was wrong.”

Roy gritted his teeth and considered what he needed to do.

* * *

As Simon climbed the stairs up Mummers House, he thought of what to say to Baz. What had happened during the dragon fight was… surprising, to say the least. Apparently he and Baz could share Magick, a fact neither had realized until they were about to be killed. He’d pushing his Magick into his erstwhile nemesis and the other had laughed and channelled it into powerful Words.

An interesting development. Especially considering Baz had joined their “side” recently, convinced somehow by Penny to help them take down the Humdrum. Merlin knows the Colonel wasn’t doing a good job of it.

In his core, Simon still felt a pulse of roiling anger. He knew it didn’t totally fit, but, well, Simon was fed up by all of it. A lifetime of feeling both “Chosen” and “not enough”. It probably wasn’t Roy’s fault, entirely, the man tried, but Simon was tired of everything he stood for.

He crested the stairs and almost walked in when he heard a voice on the other side of the door.

“That’s who you really are, Basilton,” sneered a voice he didn’t recognize. “If you act now, it’ll be so _easy_ to take down the Colonel. Your _dream_ – and I’ll help.”

What was this? Something dark wrestled in Simon. Had he been wrong? Was Baz still the bastard he’d always been, plotting Simon’s demise?

Simon shoved open the door into a sight he really didn’t expect. A human-sized lizard was holding his roommate aloft, firmly pinned against the wall, and twin tear tracks fell down Baz’s face.

“Snow,” Baz called. “Stay back.”

Simon felt himself start to go off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not totally happy with Simon and Roy's convo here, but let's see how it all plays out. Next stop: Roy still has some major beef to pick with Envy, and everyone else gets caught in the fray.


	4. Tinder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SnowBaz convo with a weird FMAB twist, Roy burning with vengeance, and a moment of Truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Answers! Crossover things! The full gamut of emotions! A couple of these scenes are new, and a couple have bounced around in my head since the start. (Including a FMAB-inspired Roy vs. Envy, since this didn't happen in this AU.)

Simon desperately tamped down panic, but smoke had already started filling the air. His pulse pounded in his ears and he felt an inexplicable urge to hurt the lizard-like creature who'd made Baz cry. (How dare they.)

Said creature breaking into their living space didn’t help matters.

And now the smoke was noticed. Apparently, incoming pyrotechnics registered as a threat.

The misshapen lizard pinning Baz against the wall released their grip, and Baz fell to the ground with a sickening thump. Simon rushed forward, and the creature shrunk down to a smaller size… One that easily dodged Simon’s grasp and made a beeline for the window. Baz stayed on the floor for a moment before stirring. The lizard paused before fully exiting, leering at the roommates with dark brown eyes.

“Don’t forget what I said,” the diminutive creature said in a now-squeaky voice. “Stop kidding yourself and go back to your roots. You think anyone cares for you here? You’ll never be enough –”

“Shut _up_ , you buffoon –” Baz gasped.

Simon’s fist drawing ever nearer, the small creature squeaked and made a final flying leap out the window. Simon and Baz could only see their receding form for a couple seconds before it faded into the night.

“So, uh…” Simon bit his lip. “Are you all right?”

Baz glowered. “You really are a numpty. Do I _look_ all right?”

“Geez.” Simon held up his hands. “No need to bite my head off.” Not that he was surprised. He should have felt affronted to some degree, like he always did, but his feelings were overridden by concern.

Baz sniffed, roughly scrubbed his face, and ran his fingers through his long hair. “Well, I suppose I’m fine… I’m made of hardy stock. As befitting of a Grimm-Pitch.”

Simon rolled his eyes, but his heart wasn’t in it. His blood probably still coursed with adrenaline or cortisol. The image of Baz looking scared, being threatened by a monster with fangs in their own home –

“Snow, it’s still smoky in here.” Baz’s lips pinched. “Are _you_ all right?”

“Who _was_ that? How did they get in here?”

Baz sighed. “That was Envy.”

“The shapeshifter?” Simon had seen posters around the school. Roy’s face darkened whenever the topic arose. “Are you _working_ with them, Baz?”

His scowl returned. “Honestly, are you thick? Of course not. I thought we got over that ‘Baz is plotting’ phase. Clearly I looked so very comfortable just now.”

Simon slumped back on his bed, the fight gone out of him. “Right.” He measured his breathing. “Sorry, old habits.” He looked across the way to Baz’s bed. Baz was finally sitting again, but he still looked tense. “Listen, what was he talking about? Who you _really are_?”

The silence stretched taut, until Simon half-expected it to twang like a broken guitar string.

Baz finally conceded and spoke first. “I know you think I’m a vampire.”

“You clearly are.”

“Simon, there _are_ no such things as vampires.” Baz’s voice never fully lost his edge, not even now. It was as if he permanently kept his hand on the hilt of a sword. Simon wished he could carry a sword, but it was about the only damn thing he could reliably create with alchemy, so it was _almost_ the same – “…are you even listening?”

“Right, sorry.”

Even so soon after tears, Baz excelled at looking haughty. “As I was saying, I’m not a vampire. You can stalk me around the castle and grounds all you’d like –”

“I do _not_ stalk you,” interjected Simon. “I’m just saying, skulking around the shadows is damn suspicious –”

“Merlin and Morgana, I’m finally telling you this – don’t you want the damn answers you’ve chased all along?” His haughtiness was a rapidly slipping mask. Simon wasn’t certain if tears or rage lurked underneath.

Simon cleared his throat. “Right, sorry.”

Baz took a deep breath, levelling his tone. “You were partly right. I’m not… strictly human.” His lips contorted and his eyes revealed a pained expression. “I’m a homunculus. At least, I was.”

Simon’s brain glitched. “Like… like the Sins? The Promised Day villains?” He desperately grasped at any tendrils of history that he’d retained.

“Exactly.” Baz stopped his study of the floor and looked at Simon again. Simon was struck at how deep and grey his eyes were. Simon never would’ve pegged grey as pretty, but here he was, mesmerized by twin slates of the finest granite. And – fuck, wait, he said _yes_ – “I was Pride.”

Pride – the most terrible Homunculus. Creature of the night. Simon had heard legends, and they were decidedly not pretty. His roommate had actively murdered people.

Simon should’ve felt vindicated, but instead he felt the beautiful, fragile _thing_ they’d formed this year crumbling between his fingers.

“Breathe,” said Baz, somewhat desperately. He walked over to the other bed and awkwardly stroked Simon’s arm. Simon was frozen in place, but he didn’t flinch at the touch. “My body was Pride, but not _me_.”

“I don’t understand,” Simon said. Baz recoiled slightly at the look on his face. “Is that why you hate the Colonel? Talking shit until you can tear the country apart again?”

“ _No._ ” Baz balled his fist and then softened again. “You have to believe me. I knew some of this, but I didn’t have all the connections until Envy cornered me.” He clenched his eyes shut for a moment. “After the Promised Day, Pride’s philosopher’s stone dissolved and he – I – was returned to human infancy. I don’t have any memories before that.” He shivered.

This time, Simon was the one to reach out. He brushed a finger along Baz’s cheek. “I believe you.”

Baz’s face illuminated with hope. “Yeah?”

“Logically, I shouldn’t, but… I do.” Simon registered how close the two were sitting but didn’t move.

“I always felt like there was something wrong with me,” admitted Baz. “I don’t have a stone in me anymore, so I haven’t got the shadow tendrils, but it feels like there’s this gaping hole inside me. An emptiness.” He pressed a finger against Simon’s chest. “I feel most comfortable in darkness, but that ache never goes away. I’m not even sure I’m properly alive, properly human, and not just a failed experiment.”

“Fuck, you seem alive to me.” Simon blinked. “Hey – is that ‘emptiness’ the reason why I could give my Magick to you?”

“Maybe,” Baz licked his lips. “Could be worth experimenting.”

Simon flushed and sent a small push of Magick across. This time he was more cautious, since Penny had reacted poorly to a similar attempt, but Baz smiled. “Does that hurt?”

“No. If anything, it feels nice.” Baz did some experimental Magick, making a small paper dragon appear from his notebook. He turned back to Simon, whose face was now even closer.

“Thanks for trusting me,” said Simon softly.

“Sure,” said Baz. He blinked, his pale cheeks more coloured than usual.

Simon swallowed. “My day was shit too. Roy wanted me to leave Watford.” His voice was practically a whisper.

Baz startled. “Oh yeah?”

“I said no.” Simon bit his lip. “I said Humdrum was my home.”

Baz looked impressed. “You defied the Colonel _and_ turned down a chance to ditch your terrible roommate?”

Simon would explain later, but for now he was weirdly mesmerized by the pools of grey. “Maybe I was wrong about something.”

“Hmm?”

“Maybe my roommate isn’t so terrible,” Simon said. “And maybe, um, he’d be interested in, um…” Simon inched closer and stared at Baz’s lips as his words ran out.

Baz closed the gap between them, looking both pleased and shocked.

“Yes, you absolute nightmare. Always yes.”

* * *

A couple of months later, Roy returned to Watford nearly empty-handed. No Humdrum answers, no Envy; just an abundance of political dissent and research for his to-read pile.

His return was not a moment too soon, apparently. Nothing _should_ have been wrong. He’d stayed in touch via calls and letters, but they weren’t instantaneous. As Roy crossed the moat, his heart chilled icy cold with the sight of smoke rising from the White Chapel. He broke into a sprint.

“Roy Mustang! So nice of you to join us!” crowed Envy. “The man of the hour.”

Roy quickly took stock of the scene, blood pounding in his ears. Envy stood on one end of the tower in their full-fledged lizard-like form. Closer to the doors, Roy made out a semi-circle of figures: Ed, Simon, Baz, and now himself.

“Back away from them, Envy,” Roy said. He pulled on his white gloves so hard they could’ve torn.

Envy’s mouth twisted into a smirk. “You’re working together, hmm? All of you, even this little Pride twerp?” They pointed a finger at Baz and Simon stepped in front of him reflexively. “You two were supposed to hate each other.”

“We told you already,” said Ed. “We’re all on the same side. The problem here is you.”

Envy looked back and forth and frowned when Roy didn’t object. “That’s no fun. You humans are much when you fight amongst yourselves, like dogs grabbing for scraps.” Roy’s glare deepened, a crease between his brows. “What’s wrong, Mustang? Tongue-tied?”

“Did you kill Maes Hughes?” This was his one chance to know for sure. Roy heard a small gasp come from Simon’s direction.

“Maybe…” said Envy coyly. “Who’s to know?”

“Tell me,” demanded Roy. He snapped his fingers, suspending a small orb of flame.

Envy laughed, a high-pitched cruel sound that grated on Roy’s ears. “I did.” Their voice was sing-song. “I killed Maes Hughes. It was just as easy as taking out that Ishvalan child.”

Roy stepped forward, his flame orb flickering, while the others stayed frozen in place. “You’re threatening my students and colleagues – and then you admit something like that? You either have a death wish or no sense at all.” Tendrils of fire reflected in Roy’s eyes. “How the hell did you even get past him?”

With a flourish, Envy transformed into Gracia Hughes. “Who would expect to get shot by the love of their life? Maes never had a chance.” The face of Simon’s mother was distorted with a murderous glee.

To his right, Simon swayed on his feet, and the room was filling quickly with smoke.

“Everybody out,” commanded Roy. “Get to safety. I’ll handle this monster… Envy does _not_ require gentle handling.”

Ed looked reluctant to leave Roy, but his protective instincts won out, and he shepherded the quaking students out of danger.

Once beyond the tower, Ed paused. “Can you two find your way back to Mummers House?”

Baz nodded tentatively.

“I don’t want to leave Roy alone.” Ed gritted his teeth, conflicted. “I’m locking the door behind me – please get to the safety of your room and wait until this is dealt with.” He rushed back into the tower alight with flames.

* * *

“But –”

“Are you kidding, Baz? There’s no way we can go to sleep like nothing is happening.” Simon was breathing heavily. “That creature killed my father.” He clenched his jaw. “I don’t know _why_ no one told me that sooner, but that’s how it is.”

“The Colonel is supposed to be insanely powerful, and Ed just joined the fight. That monster will get what’s coming to it.”

Simon looked skeptical.

“Listen, I don’t know if I should – as Pride –” Baz looked even paler than usual.

“Baz… we can talk about it later. But I know it’s not your fault. That’s not who you are now. Maybe there are still parts of you that I don’t understand, but for once in my life, I _don’t_ think you’re up to something.” Simon placed a hand on Baz’s shoulder.

Baz gave him a soft smile and the two pressed their foreheads together.

“I figure you still want to barrel into danger?” Baz cocked an eyebrow.

“Well, yeah,” said Simon sheepishly.

“I have a compromise that’s not as dreadful.” He gestured upwards. “If we’re needed, we’re right there. If they have it under control, we’re not yelled at or burned in the cross-fire.”

The boys found a spot in the ramparts that gave them a partial view.

Roy was already in the middle of what Simon could only describe as torture.

He had always heard about how intimidating “The Flame Alchemist” was, both today and in his war years. However, he’d never really reconciled this with the man’s gentler nature. Their “Colonel” headmaster was stern, sure, but scary? Simon hadn’t seen it.

This Roy Mustang wanted to watch the world burn.

“Did you hear me, Roy? Ease off,” said Ed. He was almost drowned out by Envy’s screams.

_Snap. Snap. Snap._

“Envy doesn’t deserve to live,” snarled Roy in between snaps. “Did you hear them? They killed my best friend.” _Oh._ “Envy started the Ishvalan War too, remember? This _monster_ needs to pay.”

Ed blinked. “This isn’t clean incineration like with Lust. _What the hell_ are you doing?”

Simon and Baz peered over to see better. It seemed like sometimes Roy was setting Envy on fire, but sometimes he ignited only Envy’s face. The crackle of homunculus regeneration that followed each time didn’t seem to lessen the pain. When Simon pictured Roy finally returning to Watford, he hadn’t imagined this.

“Stop!” shrieked Envy in their squeaky voice.

Roy’s eyes were flint in the dancing shadows of his own flames. “Eyeballs are predominantly made of water.” _Snap._ “How do think it feels when that water boils, over and over again?”

The carnage continued. Envy tried to run but was no match for the onslaught of flames.

Ed gulped. “Roy, I think you’ve done enough. Envy’s defeated. Just put them out of their misery.”

“Fullmetal!” barked Roy. “Have you forgotten Maes’ suffering? Have you forgotten how many people have _died_ as a direct result of this homunculus? I could go all night and Envy wouldn’t feel a thousandth of the pain they’ve caused.”

“ _Listen_ to yourself!” yelled Ed. He brandished his wand. “ **Stop right there, thank you very much!** ” Roy and Envy froze.

Simon didn’t realize he was trembling until Baz gently draped an arm over him.

“It’s going to be okay,” whispered Baz. “ **Hush-a-bye, don’t you cry.** ”

Simon would’ve been indignant at the lullaby, except that it _was_ helpful – dripping salt water from the ramparts would’ve given them away.

“This isn’t the Roy Mustang I know!” continued Ed. “Pissed off, grieving a friend, sure. But pure vengeance? No. You told me that protecting those under you was your top priority. Protection doesn’t extend to torture. And no matter what, my Roy wants to lead change for a better tomorrow. You can’t do that if you’re consumed by hate!”

Roy breathed hard through his nose, otherwise still frozen in place by Ed’s Magick.

Ed waved his hand impatiently. “ **Say what you wanna say.** ”

Simon could barely make out Roy’s reply. “I just want Envy to hurt… a fraction of how we’ve hurt.” His voice broke.

“Is it worth going down the path of vengeance and hate? Like Scar used to?” Simon had never seen Ed look so serious. “Is that how you want to define your legacy? Think of Watford, Simon, yourself… us.”

Roy closed his eyes. When he opened them, they glistened in the strewn embers all arond. “You’re right. I was going too far… I’m sorry. It’s not worth it.”

“Hellooo, still here,” squeaked Envy. They looked weak but still lively, despite the Magickal paralysis.

Roy cocked an eyebrow at them.

“The ‘being boiled’ thing is bullshit, obviously,” said Envy, “but it made sense. _Now_ you want to, what, go easy on me? You humans are pathetic, with all your fickle feelings. _Cooperation? Mercy?_ More like weakness.”

Ed scoffed. “Sometimes I wonder if you’re jealous of humans, Envy.”

“Obviously not!” Envy’s eyes darted around for a moment. “Do you wanna know something hilarious? Your kid has been eavesdropping this whole time! Simon’s gonna think you’re the homicidal maniac everyone says you are!”

Roy blanched.

_His kid?_

“Of course, it’s even better than that! You didn’t even tell him, did you?”

“How did you…?”

“One doesn’t stay a chameleon for long without picking up intel along the way.” Envy smirked.

 _Roy treats me like his own_ , reasoned Simon. _It’s semantics… he’s my guardian._ Baz looked at Simon’s aura of smoke with some nervousness.

“I’ve gotta know,” continued Envy. “Did you fuck your best friend’s wife before or after he died? Did you like it?”

“Shut up!” yelled Roy before Envy could go on. “You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Tears streaked his cheeks. “I comforted her after he passed, but it wasn’t… like that.” His voice softened now, desperate. “We were grieving. And I had no idea she became pregnant… or that I’d become a father.”

 _A father?_ My _father?_ Disorientation enveloped Simon as he started to go off, and he lost his balance. Baz grabbed his arm to steady him and suddenly the “students falling through the air” problem was doubled.

“ **I’ll be there to catch you when you fall**.” Ed rushed out the Magick all in one breath. The students’ trajectories slowed before they could strike the ground.

Roy paled further, if that was possible. Ed cast him a concerned sideways glance. Roy and Envy were still frozen by Ed’s Magick, but it wasn’t clear how long it would hold.

“Simon,” said Roy. “I meant to explain –”

“Stop,” said Simon. “Not now –” His efforts to calm himself failed. His panic was bubbling over –

The frenetic scene was overtaken with an eerie calm. The screams were eclipsed by silence and a peculiar buzzing. A Magickal dead zone.

“Hello,” said the Insidious Humdrum, now in human form.

Simon wasn’t sure if the others could hear each other, but his senses fixated on his younger mirror self.

“You’re lucky I stopped your explosion.” The Humdrum laughed coolly. “Homunculi can’t survive in dead spots. Philosopher’s Stones and their residue require residual Magick.”

Simon tore his eyes away, and what he saw made his heart pound faster.

Envy writhed, their Magickal restraint gone, but they faded away into a black dust until there was nothing left.

“What are you doing?” Simon’s voice raised in pitch.

The Insidious Humdrum just shrugged and bounced his red ball. He gestured behind Simon, prompting him to turn.

Baz was also affected.

Shit. Shit. _Shit._

“Baz!” said Simon. “Hang in there…”

Baz wasn’t turning into dust, but he clutched at his chest, panicked and wobbly. It looked like he was being burned from the inside out. His veins pulsed rejection through his body, his capillaries aflame with the memory of what they once were.

“Simon, get away –” Roy rushed towards the pair, but Ed held him back. Simon felt a tinge of gratefulness for the restraint. Maybe the pair of them were in shock. They probably thought that whatever this was inevitable.

“Baz,” pleaded Simon. He wasn’t dead yet. That’s what they always said in class. You couldn’t use alchemy to bring back the dead without inciting the Taboo. But Baz, his Baz, was still here. He was breathing, alive, and distinctly save-able. Think. Think.

The Taboo.

Ed’s sacrifice.

With his spare chalk, Simon rapidly began the necessary array. Once Ed realized, he yelled a warning and both men lunged for Simon, but he was too fast. Simon activated the array and it glowed an angry red.

He should’ve felt, well, something, when the hands started slithering up from the earth. Amazement? Terror, more likely? But Simon felt numb. He clasped Baz’s hand and hoped.

The hands grabbed him and dragged him… somewhere. Okay, so he felt panic again.

Simon screamed as he was pulled through more sheer information than humans were intended to see.

_Too much. It’s too much._

* * *

Simon landed, hard, in an entirely white space. It didn’t appear to have walls or a ceiling.

“Welcome back.”

Simon stared. A person-shaped void greeted him with a smile of sharp teeth. _Truth_ , his mind supplied helpfully. The black-lined silhouette crouched in a way that came across as more menacing than friendly.

“What do you mean? Where am I?”

Truth laughed. “I’ll make this easier for you. At least you meant to come here, this time.”

Memories slapped Simon. He’d… tried to bring back the fallen soldier he’d _thought_ was his father, but it didn’t work. A blackened creature, nearly a corpse – Merlin, hopefully that wasn’t really him – and then Simon had been dragged to this voice. He’d paid a toll back then: memory loss, and… something else. The images were confusing. But when Simon awoke, he had just exploded with Magick for the first time and the house was already enveloped with flames.

“I know you,” said Truth, “and I expect you’re here to bargain, like your professor once did.” He (they? it?) stood up. “Well?”

“Uh, that’s right.” Simon cleared his throat. “The Humdrum is hurting Baz.” He blinked rapidly. “I want to save him… substitute the organs he’s rejecting, maybe. I don’t really understand how this works.”

Truth laughed. “You really don’t.” Xerxes, he hated that row of teeth. “Let me break it down for you. Baz is the echo of a Homunculus, but he is human now. His problem now is that he’s stuck in a dead spot, and that is _not_ where an ex-Homunculus should be.”

Simon gaped.

If Truth had eyebrows, they would surely be quirked right now. “So Baz’s problem is not his body. It is the Insidious Humdrum, as you humans like to call it. And this ‘Humdrum’ is you.”

He remembered flames. A shriveled corpse. Smoke carrying the spirits of his loved ones. Simon reeled in confusion and horror.

“Equivalent exchange,” said Truth. “Surely you learned that? You could say I did you a favour: I left your body intact. But I needed a suitable toll for someone stuck in the past.” Truth’s laugh rang high and cold. Simon’s ears burned; he’d only been a young boy trying to save his dad. How was that fair?

“Your toll was more fun than most,” continued Truth. “Your alchemy is average, but your Magickal potential was excellent. I increased it even higher and drastically reduced your control.” The teeth gleamed. “You were chosen to be the perfect bomb. Every time you went off, _really_ went off, the Magickal atmosphere was strained, and lo,” Truth gestured wildly, “we got another dead zone. It’s little wonder the spots took on a mind of their own and started sending dragons and other reasons to overextend yourself.”

“Why couldn’t I see that earlier?”

Truth swatted the air dismissively. “You didn’t remember. When you go back this time, you won’t be so lucky… but that should be the least of your worries.”

Simon reflected. “Is that why the Humdrum is me, as a kid?”

“One is all. All is one.” Truth nodded. “You thought you were fighting it, but the reality is much more sinister. You are a gaping hole, a yawning abyss.”

Simon blinked. That’s it. “Let me fill the hole.”

Truth scoffed. “This isn’t a cemetery. We can’t grab shovels and play ‘re-cover the grave’.”

“Listen. These holes are a lack of Magick, right? The gaps I leeched?” Simon gulped. “I’ll fill those holes with my Magick.”

Truth looked at him appraisingly. “You do realize that’ll be the end of –”

“I know,” interrupted Simon. “I’ve felt how desperate these holes are. The Humdrum will suck me dry. But I have more Magick than I’ve ever needed – you said so yourself. Let me try this. Let me pour in my own Magick as a toll.” He was pleading now.

Truth sighed. “Very well.”

Simon was thrust back into clutching dark hands and everything faded to black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies, I was wrong – one more part after this! We’re nearly there. I want to give our protagonists a chance to 1) see what happens, 2) breathe and hopefully reconcile as needed.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading!


	5. Catharsis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally back with the mini-conclusion! I poked at this for a while but realized there was really only one scene I wanted to include for now. Hopefully this feels like it wraps up some of the drama. Never say never – if you’d like to read more in this ’verse, let me know and it might happen someday.
> 
> Without further ado: they hug it out.

“Simon? My god – Simon?” Roy’s face loomed overhead.

Simon struggled to a seated position, narrowly avoiding collision with a forehead. “Baz? Where’s Baz?” He whipped around, scanning the detritus for signs of life. Upon success, he scrambled to his feet.

“Hold on –” tried Roy.

But Simon was determined. Professor Elric was holding a body… a body that was living, breathing, and slowly regaining colour.

That’s where he needed to be.

“You absolute nightmare,” said Baz weakly. His voice croaked, like it did sometimes first thing in the morning. “You fucking did it.”

Simon helped Baz stand up again and then tightly enveloped him in a hug. “I thought I lost you.”

Baz shook his head, wearing a wordless smile that was softer than anything Simon had seen on his face before.

The only logical response was to kiss him, and to be kissed thoroughly back.

Eventually Simon remembered the rest of their… situation. Keeping an arm draped around Baz’s shoulder, he turned. Ed was similarly leaning against Roy, except that the Colonel’s smile looked taut and strained.

“Roy?” His voice came out timid, unsure.

“I – I’m so sorry. I only found out recently. I should have told you.”

“So it’s true, then?” Simon felt a confusing jumble of emotions all at once.

Roy nodded. “The circumstances were… difficult. Hughes loved his family more than anything, but after his death… She moved away, and I just never knew…” His face was tissue paper trying desperately not to crumple. “I never realized. But you’ve always been like a son to me.” His gaze lifted to Simon again. “I just wish I could’ve been there for you more.” His voice trembled.

Almost without realizing, Simon stepped towards him. Baz stayed by his side.

“You were.”

“You said for yourself, you’re an adult who doesn’t need a guardian. You are capable and strong.”

“Maybe not… but maybe I still need a dad.”

A gleam of hope. “Even a shit dad? A horribly busy one embroiled in politics?”

“I could still use one like that.” Simon tentatively smiled. “It’s kind of messed up, and yeah, I have questions, but if I already loved you as a guardian… someday I might be able to think of it differently.”

They closed the distance between them and hugged.

Ed sighed, gave into the day’s sentimentality and tackled them. Simon looked over to Baz, who was still paler than he’d like to see, and gestured an invitation with his chin. Hesitancy melting, Baz rolled his eyes and made it a proper group hug.

Simon’s eyes pricked with heat, which made no sense at all. His Magick was nearly gone, but the world was safer, he still had alchemy, and for the first time in his life, he realized he had both love and a family. He clenched his eyes shut. It didn’t solve everything, but the mushy blob of his heart felt something it hadn’t for a while: pure, unadulterated hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Voila – pure fluff to help with the angst, and finally the little “completed” checkmark. Thanks so much for following along with this AU!


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